My quick and super easy secret to being the most unique woman in the room

My quick and super easy secret to being the most unique woman in the room

What makes a woman unique? What makes her stand out? Here’s my secret — and it’s way easier to do than you might think.

It’s so easy to blend in at a social event and not get noticed. Trends are just that — trends. By their very definition, everyone is “doing it.” That’s what makes trends, well… trendy. EVERYONE is wearing a certain piece of clothing or wearing the a certain style of shoe. So while trends might be popular, their very popularity is also the problem of blending in.

So if you want to be different… if you want to be unique… if you want to stand out from the crowd — you have to do what no other woman in the room is doing. Perhaps more specifically, you have to be wearing something that no other woman in the room is wearing. And I’m not talking about fashion here.

I’m instead talking about FRAGRANCE.

What’s so special about fragrance? Well, in and of itself — absolutely nothing. Women wear fragrance all the time. Men — sometimes. I know a lot of men who don’t wear cologne at all. It’s just not their thing.

That’s too bad, because I love a good men’s cologne. So much so that men’s cologne has become my little secret!

And now, for something completely different

Yep! I wear men’s cologne. And it makes me different from all the other women in the room.

The other day I was at a social event, and the woman sitting next to me was wearing a very distinctive fragrance — and I recognized it immediately.


Way back when in the mid 1990s, during a family trip to downtown Chicago’s Marshall Field’s department store to enjoy the Christmas decorations, my Aunt Josie bought me a bottle of Angel. Back in the day, Angel was an extremely unique scent, and when you wore it, you stood out, big time. (You can order it and find out for yourself what it’s like by clicking HERE.)

Now, more than 20 years later — not so much. It’s still an interesting scent, and the woman sitting next to me smelled nice, of course. But I had just smelled the very same fragrance on my daughter as I was walking out of the door of my home only an hour before running into this lady. It may still be distinctive, but it’s no longer different.

But how many women are going to be wearing a cologne made for a man? Answer — not many. In a single room or at a single event, probably no one. If you do it, you’ll most likely be the ONLY WOMAN in the room who is wearing that scent.

And here’s the other thing — the men probably won’t have on your fragrance either. Or any fragrance, for that matter! Again, sadly and much to my personal chagrin, it seems to me that not many men are wearing fragrances nowadays. If it appears that they have a fragrance on, it’s typically by default: The scent is either from their shaving cream, the soap they used in the shower, or their underarm deodorant, rather than because of a fragrance that they applied separately and deliberately.

So now you have your pick from a whole new world of fragrance choices that can help you be unique and maybe even get noticed in a crowd! And may I add — assuming that the fragrance is applied correctly and you haven’t taken a bath in it — you’ll be noticed in the most subtle and subliminal way. When a man smells an attractive scent on a woman, he might know he’s drawn to you — but he won’t always know why.

Manly, yes… but I like it, too!

However — in my personal opinion, you aren’t going to be able to get away with wearing just ANY men’s cologne. Frankly, some scents are simply too manly for a woman.

But I’ve run into two fragrances that I love, and I wear one of them quite often — and again, in my humble opinion, a woman can wear these and not have to worry about not being feminine.

Now, I’ll grant you — neither of these fragrances could be described as “flowery.” These are men’s fragrances, mind you — so you can’t expect them to smell like a meadow of wildflowers or a bouquet of roses. Instead, men fragrances tend to be woodsy, citrusy, spicy, smokey — even leathery. Sometimes florals do show up within the notes, but I can’t think of any men’s fragrance that has a dominating floral scent.

But even though they aren’t flowery, they are still wonderful scents, even for us women. My favorite one is downright delicious.

I almost don’t want to say what they are, because I truly am giving my secrets away. But, just like women who won’t share their recipes, there’s something very selfish about me holding back. So share I will!

My two secret weapons

The first — my now long-term favorite — is Spicebomb, which was launched by the Dutch fashion house Viktor & Rolf 2012. (You can order it for yourself by clicking HERE.)

It’s correctly named, as you feel like the spices are exploding all over you when you try to put it on. (No wonder the fragrance is loaded into bottle that actually does look like a grenade, complete with a pull pin.) As amazing as it smells, it is EXTREMELY powerful. I’ve found a little — and I do mean a little — goes a very, very long way.

The fragrance notes are comprised of bergamot, grapefruit, cinnamon leaf (big time cinnamon smell), pink pepper, lavandin (lavender), chili, saffron, elemi, vetiver, balsam fir, tobacco, and white leather.

The second — my brand-new favorite (just introduced in 2019) — is simply called “K.” Created by Dolce & Gabbana, this blue colored fragrance in a bottle topped with a manly king’s crown is much lighter than Spicebomb, yet still has a heavier feeling to it than a typical women’s perfume, purely due to its masculinity. It’s a tough fragrance to describe. It’s a little peppery. Perhaps a touch of wood or pine. Definitely some citrus. It’s something I could see wearing with a little black dress number at a nightclub, or with a more “edgy” outfit at a rock concert.

In actuality, K is comprised of the following notes (and I wasn’t far off at all in my description): blood orange, lemon, juniper berries, pimento, sage, geranium, lavandin, cedar wood, vetiver, and patchouli.

In both cases, I smelled these scents for the first time as marketing samples in magazines. Spicebomb immediately knocked me out — almost literally. It reminds me a great deal of Opium, by Yves Saint Laurent, which came out way back in 1977. It has many of the same notes, with the addition of a number of exotic fruity scents and more florals. I’ve known a number of women who hate Opium. Not me. I’ve always adored it. I guess I’m just a spicy girl!

(Speaking of Opium, another fragrance I love is its extremely distant cousin — Black Opium. I can’t get enough of it. I’m planning to discuss about the whole Black Opium family of fragrances in an upcoming blog post, so stay tuned for that! If you’d like to try it out for yourself, just click HERE.)

A “sexy aphrodisiac” for men

Here’s something to remember about spicy scents — they are extremely attractive to men, and in a very sexy way. Back in 2010, a study was done that revealed that the scent of PUMPKIN PIE SPICE actually stimulated arousal in men. The original article about the study in the New York Daily News actually referred to spicy scents as a “sexy aphrodisiac” for men.  (Hmmmm. Maybe we should take a bath in the stuff, afterall.)

No, I don’t always wear men’s cologne. I’m way too in love with too many different fragrances to limit myself just to men’s fragrances. And I love how the different scents allow me to always match both my mood and the moment. But if I want to be noticed and not smell like every other woman in the room — let’s just say I know how to pull out the big guns — or perhaps I should say, I know how to drop the big bombs. 😉